Once the child... (Once the Child · Peter Bjorn and Victoria Bergsman)

     Let me tell you...nothing makes you feel more odd than reversing the roles with your parents.  I had to do it while my Mom was ill.  Become her parent.  Yell at her to take her medicine and drink enough fluids.  Now I have to do it with my elderly father.
     Now, many of you KNOW my Dad.  He is full of spirit and energy (considering he is about to turn 85).  He still drives (not always safely) and goes out (usually to buy scratchies).  He gets his haircut from the cute little hairdresser he likes to visit.  He doesn't mind a field trip to the casino.  He runs to the supermarket for any item and drives them all nuts to find it for him.  The kids make him play baseball in the yard and have light saber fights, etc.  Always up for a chance to watch his babies...he is a wonderful grandfather.  But he's getting older.  He dozes on the couch after a bit and needs to rest from time to time.  He yells at us when we park too far from a building.  He also misses his lovey very, very much.  So we put up with the rants about shoes in his way or cilantro that I sneak into his food.  He is a wonderful man in a million ways and we are all lucky to have him.
     That being said.  He is also a pain in my ass.  He knows nothing of the bills, credit cards, taxes, etc.  He has never planned for anything.  He was taken care of by a huge family of women and then a devoted wife for almost 40 years.  So guess who has the burden now?  Part of me is very happy to pay him back for the years of fathering that he delivered to this curly haired little cookie.  But parts of me are amazed at how little he did on his own.  The man could oversee building some of the world's most famous structures but now...here...he is clueless.  We have little fights here and there and he "apologizes" with a box of chocolate or a new flowering plant.  At least he still knows how to charm a lady.  The last few months have been hard.  I can't mourn because I am too busy taking care of business.  Maybe that's a good thing.  All I know is I'm exhausted.  We include him in as much as we can.  I leave him notes each morning to remind him of the day of the week it is and where we all are if the house is empty.  I help him with pretty much everything.  Except the scratchies.  That he seems to have no problem with.  He took care of me for a long time...still does in a lot of ways so it's the least I can do.  I know someday he might not know me anymore and another day he will be gone so I hang on to each moment as much as I can.  I will make notes, I will do two sets of bills and budgets, I will take care of the house...but it doesn't mean I like the new role of parent to my own Dad.  It's hard.  It's tricky.  It's confusing.  In many ways.  So I remember the days he took care of his little girl (Cookie, Meatball, Peanut, Chrissy) and all he did for me and remember that I owe him.  It's that simple.  But if you are young enough to have young vibrant parents...enjoy them for me please...and don't waste a day not letting your parents know how much you love them!